Posted by M. Mihkel Mathiesen on December 06, 1999 at 02:39:30:
The Ministry of Philosophical Fisheries had a November visitor; a tradition of long standing.
It was the Doctor; the Minister of Health.
We know him well; an affable figure who always knows that nature will take its course and acts accordingly.
A late night was spent during which a discovery was discussed. The Ministry of Fisheries had identified the matter - for want of a more appropriate word - which souls are made of.
The matter is identified by what it is not.
It is characterized in that it has extremely low entropy. Mathematical attempts to confine it indicate that zero is too large a number.
It is the conclusion of the Minister of Philosophical Fisheries that the matter is closely related to what existed prior to the Big Bang. A simple philosophical argument proves this thesis with the aid of thermodynamics; particularly the Second Law as formulated by Maxwell and Helmholtz.
As our learned Ladonians will obviously know, the hero of 20th century science, Einstein, tried and failed to comprehend the essential work of Helmholtz. He, after decades of thought, pronounced that entropy is the logarithm of likelihood. And that, my fellow Ladonians, is exactly the opposite of what our souls are.
This is the gift of Helmholtz and the modest Christmas offering the Ministry of Philosophical Fisheries offers to the Nation.
Live well, be comforted by the idea that your immortal souls are exactly that. This will explain to you what the entire purpose is of each and every one of you.
With the best intentions,
Lojtn.
Minister
Ministry of Philosophical Fisheries